So I find myself defending myself yet again

In light of this post on Borderline Hikkomori, much of which there are lies present, I have to put up my own counter-argument in attempt to prevent my name from being further slandered. To be honest, I’m sick of this. If they didn’t want me speaking ill of them, they should have handled things better. To cover a few things, as honestly they’re twisting the truth to make me look like a bad guy.

1.) I did not speak of matters on twitter after I told to stop. This was before she told me. My calling CJ 29 times was my attempt to make nice and not to have to make such a post on twitter. However, as CJ is a coward, she never picked up, and now is trying to change the story to make me at fault. Nice. This ‘internal blog drama’ that I revealed was the following, which caused CJ to turn on me and start threatening me.

I DO NOT KNOW WHAT IT HAPPENING IN THE BLOG. I MAY FIND MYSELF KICKED OUT IN THE MORNING. I DON’T KNOW.

I’m so sorry that I cared enough about my readers to keep them informed.

CJ later admitted that she removed me because she could not handle having a blogger who was OCD. I did not save the message, much to my regret.

2.) The attacks were more often then just ‘twice’. Believe me, I would have never become such a mess if it were such a case. However, these were the combo of what happened between him and CJ. Any text messages I sent to CJ were a result of either his actions or her actions, not my own initiative.

3.) Yes, I have trolled Borderline Hikkomori a few times. Yes, it was immature, but unrelated to any of the above. All of this trolling came out Borderline Hikkomori allowing some very rude comments on my posts rather then deleting then because they were ‘my posts’. Lowering myself to their level was bad.

4.) While Rakuen claims to have nothing to do with me, and everything is a mere coincidence, while I have no way of proving it, I think he’s bsing. That’s a lot coincidences. Not to mention the admitting about lying and the fact that he’s still lying in his post about what transpired.

Whether you choose to believe me or not is up to me, as Rakuen can word things much better then I can, and I can’t hope to compete with that. I’m tired, and have a test tomorrow. I still stand by that I have the right to have feel threatened. There’s no question that CJ is bending the truth to make it fit her perfect world, and I find her a horrible person for it. I can’t provide the same proof for Rakuen, and it’s left to opinion if he is/isn’t has been doing this as some sort of revenge against me. However, while people can change, his past actions make it hard for me to believe he has. I do doubt that anyone links him to my twitter to see what I say though, and I think that he found it of his own initiative.

On the fact that I keep attacking Borderline Hikkomori, I was wrongfully removed from the blog. That alone, in my mind, rids them of any credibility and quality as a blog. I will not stop expressing my hatred of the blog. Honestly? I find it funny that they feel so threatened by me that they had to screenshot what I was saying and what not. I have never lied about happened. I will never lie. I have never committed libel. I may be wrong about something, I’m human, but I’ve never lied to hide the truth. However, I will not keep things under wraps, and will make things public. If that achieves the goal that they’ll think twice before they treat another blogger, or even another person the way I was treated, then it was worth it. I’m not sorry they feel harassed or tired of this. I think they are receiving what they deserve for this treatment. When you perform an action, there is a consequence. The consequence of my having a poorly timed breakdown and their close minded attitude was that I was removed. The consequence of this unfair removal was this.

Perhaps this isn’t entirely, as looking back, CJ was the one who treated me like crap, however both of them proceeded to attack me, and with Rakuen’s past history, I don’t feel like I did anything wrong. If you guys are reading this, you messed up royally, and did it to the wrong person. To kick someone out like I was kicked out after I’d done most the blogging and covered CJ’s butt when she was too busy to care her own blog? Sucks. Thanks for that thank-you.

Furthermore, this would have never happened if CJ had been a rational person and at some point talked it out instead of being a coward and refusing too , and Rakuen wasn’t her mindless attack dog brainwashed by whatever she said who went so far as to tell me that I just wasn’t working hard enough to control my disorder (panic attacks don’t work that way) and that I obviously deserved to be locked up. He never took in consideration my side of the story, and was single minded about the whole incident since CJ came crying to him about it.

I regret nothing. I hope I get into The Moritheil Review.

Also, CJ and Rakuen or any other BH blogger, if you comment on this, your post will be deleted. You’ve made it clear that we can’t talk this out like rational people and have to resort to talking through blog posts.

Believe it or not, I’ve come to accept the potential stalking, finally letting it all out on my comment on The Moritheil Review. While they are so insecure as to be bother by my so called ‘harassment’, I will not namedrop, but say that a few bloggers have acted as role models for me and helped me let it go. I’m more concerned with keeping up this blog, maintaining my relationship with my boyfriend, doing well in school, and most importantly, treating my growing illness that is migraine related. Thanks to the fellow bloggers around me, I feel safe and secure, and not afraid of what happens next, but that these guys have my back regardless, and don’t care about this petty problem.

5 Comments

Filed under Real Life

5 responses to “So I find myself defending myself yet again

  1. Furthermore, my leaving post was not removed due to the content of the post, but as CJ was so happy to brag about at the time, for her to assert her control over me, and have me kicked out rather then leave.

  2. Pingback: Accusations fly « The Moritheil Review

  3. Wow, I have to give you my support on this issue…

    Rakuen definitely goes under “trying to turn people against you”, even if I can’t tell whether he’s doing this purposefully and lying out of his mouth, or he’s doing it subconsciously and hasn’t realized it yet. Also, while “mindless” and “brainwashed” is a bit harsh from my limited perspective, “attack dog” seems to be fitting him a bit too well.

    Not trying to fan the flames, but CJ needs to take her own frontline. I have no respect for those who toss jabs while hiding behind another; only the worst types of girls does that <.<

  4. I hope you’re doing better soon.

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